The Name Game

Readers of my blogs know that my father is one of eight children. Well, really, he is one of ten, but two died as infants. There are 15 grandchildren, 12 great-grandchildren, and too many in laws to count. It gets hard to remember every one's name. Grandma did a good job, but there were times that she did the 'Diane,Sylvia,Roberta,Ray,Mark,Sue,David,Tim whatever your name is'.

My own mother has done that too, and she only had two names to keep track of. It usually occurred when one of us was in trouble. She would start with her sister, Arlene. Then knowing that wasn't right, she tried her own name, Kathy. She went through the family, somehow missing the name she was searching for. We stood there giggling, and when she got to my Aunt's dog who had been dead for a few years, we told her our name. Which seemed to frustrate her even more. My sister and I tease her that it's a good thing she didn't have more children-she'd have never known who we were.

My dad gets my sister and I confused, too. Most of the year he has no problem. But if I'm visiting NY, or my parents are visiting here, Dad calls me Laura. The day I leave, he stops. My sister and I look enough alike that you can tell we are sisters, but unless I'm wearing my hair curly (which is a recent development- for 33 years my hair was stick straight, in the past year or so it has gotten curlier and curlier); we still look different enough that you can tell us apart. I think my Dad is so used to my sister being the daughter he's around all the time, that he just gets us confused. The funniest incident was in December. I was sitting in the Detroit airport, waiting for my connection to Albany. I had called him to tell him my flight was on time. I got his voicemail, so I left a message. When he called me, I didn't get to the phone fast enough, and it went to my voicemail. We played phone tag for a couple of minutes- I called him back, he didn't answer fast enough, and then he called me back. When I answered he said 'Oh crap, Laura! How did I get you? I'm trying to call Amy'. My response was 'It is Amy, Dad. You're starting before I even get there.' On the phone, my sister and I sound the same, so I have to give him that.

I used to think my mother was nuts because she couldn't keep track of two kids, and called us the wrong name. I'm starting to understand her a little better. When I am with Sydney, I end up calling her Onyx. Yes. I call her by my dog's name. I don't mean to. In my house, when I'm talking to a little girl, it is Onyx. If I'm talking to a little man, it's Cobalt. Sometimes I'm able to catch it before I get 'Onyx' out. I get the 'ah' sound, and then realize it is Sydney I'm talking to. So I say 'Ahh...Sydney'. I don't know how I will turn Cobalt into Drew. I need to start figuring that out, because I know I will call my little Bruiser by his canine cousin's name. I won't mean to, but I do.

I also do the reverse. The first couple of days after I have been in NY, I call my dogs by the kids' names. I pet Onyx and call her Sydney. I snuggle with Cobalt and coo about my little Drew-boo. The difference is, in my house, no one hears me. At my sister's house, there are others to hear me.

It went to a new level with this last trip. We were all at my sister's, and she was trying to get Sydney to leave the kitchen. I said "Sydney, come here girl" as I patted my leg and made a kissing sound- yes, just as I would if I were calling the dogs. I didn't realize what I had done, until the room erupted in laughter. Well, what can I say? My dogs are my children, so my mind gets them confused. No doubt Sydney will just think her Aunt Amy is crazy.